Bayern Munich missed out on a place in the DFB Pokal final after missing all four of their penalties in the shootout against Borussia Dortmund

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Alia Janine caricature

Retired American porn star, actress and comedian.

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Stefan Effenberg Wolfsburg days

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Former France international Jean-Paul Bertrand-Demanes has described Zlatan Ibrahimovic as a "flat-track bully" who can only eat small fish for breakfast.

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Gabriel Batistuta Fiorentina days

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Bayern Munich have won the Bundesliga yet again - despite their army of walking wounded!

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Adriano cartoon Fiorentina Days

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Sir Alex Ferguson believes Cristiano Ronaldo is better than Lionel Messi because only the Real Madrid forward could ‘play for Doncaster Rovers and score a hat-trick’

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The stakes are always high whenever Arsenal and Chelsea square off! What will Mourinho and Wenger fight about this time?

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Unselfish Hazard

Paul Scholes claims Eden Hazard is too unselfish compared to Cristiano Ronaldo and Lionel Messi, and needs to find a "hunger" for goals

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